not in our stars, but in ourselves
Dear Ronan Farrow,
Hi! You don’t know me, but I am at least 85% certain that I’m in love with you. Hear me out, okay?
First and foremost: you are just SO brilliant, and brilliantly funny, and using all that brilliance and humor to draw attention – and action – to things that really matter. It’s so easy for someone as gifted as you to rest on his laurels, donate a few dollars here and there to some slacktivist organization, pat himself on the back, and call it a day; but not you. No White Savior complex for you, my dear. You don’t congratulate yourself for caring. You just care, and try to make other people care, and make sure that those of us with the privilege and power to change things for the better do so.
Oh, and yes, you are fucking funny. I am going to try to get a TV before your show starts just so I can watch it every day, or however often it’s going to be on, probably while reading your tweets during the commercial breaks. While a man with a sense of humor isn’t an automatic in with the ladies, you are funny enough that you wouldn’t have to be devastatingly gorgeous to get me to let you buy me a drink.
But you are devastatingly gorgeous, so that’s nice, too.
Second – and a distant second! – there is of course your, shall we say, colorful family history. But that’s okay. Didn’t Tolstoy say something like “Every crazy family is crazy in its own way”? That was the gist of it, anyway. All families are crazy. Don’t even worry about it. You should meet some of my relatives – oy gevalt. Needless to say, it is rather wonderful that you’ve turned out as you did (seemingly well-adjusted, interested in things far beyond yourself, dedicated to leaving the world a better place than you found it, etc., etc.) with such a history. Some people just can’t rise above these kinds of things – but you have, and you’re lovely, and I wish you’d ask me out.
Did I mention that you’re hot? Because boy – you hot.
I look forward to hearing from you. I live in the Bostonish area. My birthday is coming up. Make my dreams come true, please.