more stars than in the heavens

not in our stars, but in ourselves

quick and dirty midweek roundup



1. We live in a world where the BBC advocates consuming your own blood.  Okay.

Superb MS Paint skillz courtesy of yours truly.

Superb MS Paint skillz courtesy of yours truly.

2. The evil manservants of Satan himself – by which I mean the organizers of Boston 2024 – now say they want a statewide referendum to determine how much actual support there is for the Olympics.  The referendum would be put to a vote in November 2016; the official bid to the IOC is due in January 2016.  While I’d love to believe that this will explode in their faces, it’s pretty obviously a PR move.  I don’t know, kids.  I’m nervous.  I’m nervous that (a) Massholes west of Worcester won’t care either way, (b) Massholes within the so-called 128 belt (i.e., people who live in suburbs west of Boston but on the eastern side of the portion of I-95 that overlaps with Route 128 – places like Newton, Lexington, Dedham, Canton, etc., etc.; expanding the belt farther to include suburbs to the east of I-495 includes places like Wellesley, Natick, Needham, Concord, etc.) are rich and clueless enough to be able to see it as an exciting novelty that they can drive their unnecessary SUVs (or Priuses, for the conscientious soi-disant liberals living in the W suburbs) into Boston to attend, with their generic little children and tanker-strollers, (c) Massholes across the state – those who live/work in Boston as well as those who don’t give a toss about it – will be stuck with a huge bill that we, not the backers of this bullshit bid, will have to pay somehow or other, and (d) the referendum will probably be about as clearly phrased as this poll from an episode of Parks and Recreation: 

Do you think Leslie Knope should be in England, do you not think that, or do you not think that that?
Not be in Europe: 48%
It’s okay: 17%
Confused by the question: 35%

In short: I’m nervous that we might actually end up winning this goddamn thing.

This is an ideal number of dogs.

This is an ideal number of dogs.

3. Dog lovers are smarter and better than everyone else.  It’s science.  Well, sort of.


4. In case you missed it, Ted Cruz didn’t think to buy the domain name before announcing his presidential bid.  Whoopsadaisy!

Satire or actual screencap? Soon, who will know or care.

Satire or actual screencap? Soon, who will know or care.

5. Recently, I discovered that you can tell Facebook that you don’t care about the trending stories popping up in your newsfeed.  You can also tell it that you want to see something else, you’ve already seen it, or you find it offensive.  But really, what’s better than telling Facebook you don’t care about their insidious scheme to melt millions of users’ brains to mush?  I don’t care, Facebook.  I don’t care about what some kiddie-diddler in the Midwest is doing.  I don’t care about a washed-up ’90s star’s Instagram post.  Viral videos, leaked photos, some nobody’s opinion of some other nobody – I just don’t care about it.  And I don’t care for the mainstream media’s devolution into a large-scale Facebook “trending” feature: news in gif form, with about as much depth and analysis.  I’m no news junkie (whatever the fuck that means), but I do try to keep myself somewhat informed.  That’s nearly impossible to do, in any meaningful way, unless you avoid U.S. media almost entirely.  I don’t want to sound like a snob – because I’m not, I promise – but I do wish I could just turn on my TV and get some decent news and analysis, rather than have to sift through the blood-drinking articles on the BBC’s website. (Seriously, what the fuck.) While Australia takes quite a few cues from the U.S. that it shouldn’t, it does have a solid fucking news outlet.  The Australian Broadcasting Corporation: know it, love it.  It was just about the only on-air TV I watched when I lived there, and I miss it.


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This entry was posted on March 25, 2015 by and tagged , , , .
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